Hard to go back

I remember Jeanne and her daughter Bridget brought me back to the institution around dusk one night after spending the day with their family. I wasn’t looking forward to going back to the institution. I was getting out of the car crying and Jeanne said, “Bob I have to”. I just kept crying walking up the stairs. She gave me a hug and told me that she loved me. She left and I had this pocket watch that I swirled around and kept slamming it against the wall until it broke. I felt like spending the day with her was so wonderful and nice, but being dropped off at the institution was hell and very hard on me. That night I had a hard time sleeping. Other nights I would cry and rock myself to sleep. I just wanted to be loved. I wanted to have a family that would care about me and take care of me. And I wanted it to be Jeanne. I loved Jeanne. She was probably one of the most comforting people in my life. Over the years we kept in touch and I was able to tell her how much I loved her.