The Badge

There was a man who lived just away from the dormitory who ran the place. I would watch cartoons with his children. At one time he was a police officer. He gave me a real badge. It meant a lot to me and it was stolen from me. I would steal it back until finally I never saw it again. I would try to hide it in a really good place but he would rip my room apart to steal it again. I felt bad going back to his house knowing that I lost the badge he had given me.

At the institution we would go to school. There was a separate building which was a gym that we could play in.

Fire!!! Fire!!! Fire!!!

Once I got so mad and had so much hate because people were teasing me that I threw all my tokens in the trash and lit a fire inside the cafeteria in a trash can. People were yelling “Fire” “Fire”. It burnt the kitchen and a portion of where we ate. I got in trouble. I got my privileges taken away for a week. One of the staff talked to me and asked why I would do it. I told him I hated it here, I’m tired of everyone teasing me. I want a new mom and dad. He said they were trying hard to find me a mom and dad.

That night I went to bed and cried myself to sleep. I knew what I did was wrong. I just felt like I wished like I had a mom and dad. There were many nights I cried myself to sleep.

While I lived there I remember thinking where is my Mom, why isn’t she taking care of me? I’ve thought this several times during my life.